No Response

Good Lord I’ve been busy!  Work’s been crazy, after work’s been crazy… just busy busy busy.

My friend and I recorded a live studio session last night.  It went really well, all things considered.  Basically NO planning was involved, it was very much a spur of the moment thing.  The two of us are playing a benefit together next week, so we thought it would be a good idea to make a little album to sell at the event, give half the money we make to the cause, and the other half can cover the costs of making it.

It was nice to revisit a handful of songs I wrote years and years ago but haven’t played anytime recently.  They’re songs I wrote around the time I went to Saint Petersburg, Russia to work at an orphanage, and they definitely follow that heart-set and mind-set, and because the benefit is for an orphanage in Romania, I felt it very fitting to add some of these tunes.

It’s strange how a song that meant so much to you at one point in your life, and you listen or play it again years later, has those exact same emotions and thoughts flooding back.  It’s like a time warp.  But along with that the song seamlessly adapts to your current emotions and life.

I fucking love music.

That trip to Russia actually directly resulted in me quitting the band I was playing in at the time.  I grew up with those guys, and it was a major decision, one which, when I made it, I didn’t realize exactly how much impact it would have on my life.

When you get away from everything for awhile, and widen your perspective, it’s so easy to see things for what they are.  Being away in Russia, and helping the people there, who lived such a dark, depressed life, made me see through all the stupid charades of what we were trying to do as a band.  It killed me that when the trip was over, I didn’t AT ALL look forward to going home.

So, within a couple weeks, I quit.  Other band members = not happy.

My best friend from 1st grade on wouldn’t talk to me.  Those guys were my whole life, and never did I dream that would end our friendship because I left the band.  It was pretty crazy, and stupid really.  So I was left alone to fend for myself in a city where I knew no one.  That sucked.  But, in the end, I learned so much about myself, grew my own legs underneath me and my own brain in my head.

I also know I would not be where I am today if our friendship would have continued.  But, it still was pretty dumb that I lost my best friend the way I did.

It took about 3 years before we had a somewhat friendly conversation.

Recently, he seems to have gotten over it all, and we have nice occasional catch-up emails, or “Dude, I just saw blah blah blah” stuff.  Nothing major.

Well, last weekend, he (the guitar/singer), his brother (the bass player), and their friend (who replaced me as the drummer) came to town.  (They’re not still together as a band - fyi)

We made sort-of plans to meet up, they didn’t really have a plan or know where they would be or when they would be there.  My sister was also coming to town that weekend, which added to the complications.

They figured out what they were gonna do that night, I was all set to meet up with them later on at a jazz club that’s open until 4 AM.  Well, they ended up getting “tired” at like 10 and headed back out to where they were staying.

Lame-O.

My sister and I stayed out like rock stars until 4:30 AM.  I haven’t done that in a while.  Good fun.  We saw one of the most coolest band’s in Chicago called Mucca Pazza.  That’s right, most coolest.

I never did catch up with those guys.  They didn’t come back to the city until they were going to the airport.  I was bummed, but felt bad because I very easily could have met them earlier on Friday, and would have, had I known they wouldn’t be around AT ALL after that.

Bummer dude.  What can you do?

I sent my friend a genuinely heartfelt email, telling him how bummed I was for not seeing him.

No response.

What the hell?  First of all, my sister coming to town was planned WAY before.  We needed some serious bro/sis time after everything that went down with her.  I told him that, I told him how disappointed I was that the timing didn’t work out and blah blah blah…

Nothing.

I told him “I know we’ve slowly been trying to rebuild that bridge between us, and sincerely hope this didn’t do anything to harm it.  That sounded cheesy, but I think you know what I mean.”

Nothing.

What. The. Fuck?

……..moving along now.

My Girl’s been acting crazy lately.  Something about LA that sucks the soul right out of a person, and can make a girl WACKO.  More on that later perhaps, I think she’ll be fine though.

She was weird and shady last night, that messed with me.  I talked to her at midnight when I got home, and she was really weird and short with me on the phone and hung up quickly.  Then she text me and said she’d call me later.  I went to sleep and woke up at like 5 to no missed calls, so I called her.  She answered and was drunkenly getting fast food and staying at her friends, we talked for like 2 seconds.  We hung up, and I thought, “I hope she makes it there ok…” So sent her a text asking if she could call when she got there.

No response.

I sent another little “hello?” text.

Nothing.

Then I realized she had turned off her phone.

I immediately went into freak out mode, and COULD NOT FALL BACK ASLEEP.

All I wanted to do was go to sleep, cause I knew my mind was only messing with me cause I was tired, but couldn’t sleep cause my stupid mind was messing with me… a super vicious circle.

I eventually fell back asleep at the ridiculous time of 6:30, and felt fine when my alarm went off.

She called around 12 and sounded like death, she had to meet her friend to work out, she would call me after.  It’s 3, still no call.

I’m just glad I don’t go into freak out mode about stuff like this anymore.  I must be getting “old” or “mature”.

I know for a fact, if I EVER turned my phone off at a time like that, she would rip my balls off.

Good thing I have these shows coming up to keep me busy and occupied, or I could possibly be in full on freak out mode.

Plus, I’ve had Romanian orphans on my mind, so I know how good I have it, and stupid shit like this is simply stupid shit.

Playing RIGHT now:  I’m actually listening to myself, the recordings from last night… kinda pathetic I suppose.

PS - Miss Kara, if you read this, here I am all bent out of shape about people not responding to emails, I WILL respond oh so very soon, you’ve just given me a giant piece of cake to eat.